


Half a Heart: An entry for Sesskag week 2015, Day 2

by aclosetnerd



Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: F/M, Sesskag - Freeform, sesshomaruxkagome, sesskagweek2015
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-03
Updated: 2015-08-03
Packaged: 2018-04-12 17:02:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4487607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aclosetnerd/pseuds/aclosetnerd
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Anagpesis / ana·ga·pe·sis / noun–  falling out of love; the feeling of not loving someone or something once loved.</p><p>Kagome was always told to never do things with only half of a heart.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Sato Aiko's Lament

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys, it's been a while since I wrote fan fiction, so bare with me haha. Hope you enjoy it :)

**January 6, 1986**

A nearly drunken into a stupor uncle once advised Sato Aiko, "Never half ass two things, whole ass one thing.”

After that, the uncle preceded to vomit on her shoes and the Sato family agreed that it was a memorable family reunion for everyone and Aiko's pink flats. Still, this statement struck Aiko, for it held some truth: why should people do two things at once and fail, when they can do one thing really well then succeed? Thus, at the ripe age of 13, she decided to do things wholeheartedly.

**September 21, 1988**

Passion and determination became her motto; nothing too big or small prevented Aiko from fulfilling tasks with vigor. In junior high school she joined the basketball team and immediately found out that running plus bouncing a ball proved to be too much hand-eye coordination for clumsy Aiko. Despite this setback, she begged the coach to keep her as manager.

**February 14, 1991**

There is no doubt that she applies the same mindset on love. Armed with tooth aching chocolate and romantic confession letters, Aiko set her eyes on senior high school as the setting of her first love. Unfortunately, her enthusiasm was always too much to handle in senior high school and her crushes were doomed to be unrequited, so she was resigned to relationship virginity. Nevertheless, the 5’4 petite Aiko assured herself that it was not the matter of appearance but heart. These boys she chased after lacked passion and hoped that one day she will meet the perfect boy—no, the _perfect man_ that could keep up.

**March 1, 1995**

On her usual walk to work, she began tracing the familiar brick pattern of her favorite industrial building and attempted to stifle out a yawn. Her job at the Sōgō Hospital is complicated, tiring, and demanding: a nurse for the Critical Care ward. This meant constant attendance to patients on the brink of death, but she knew this was the type of work that her storm like will stood as an advantage.

Groaning and rubbing the back of her neck to soothe the knots forming, “Nine hours of standing! Without sitting once during the shift, nobody should be doing this.”

Pausing in front of an apartment complex, she notices her reflection on the first floor window. Forefinger gently tracing the curve of her brow, then her hooked nose, and finally stopping at her thin pink lips. Aiko is not remarkably pretty, though she has striking features at a second glance: flattering bobbed hair frames her oval face and twinkle in her eyes can compete with the stars. Shaking her head and thinks to herself, today will be a new day with new experiences. And to highlight this declaration, she makes an abrupt turn from her usual path to work.

This detour still lead out to the street the hospital was located and Aiko glanced at her wrist watch confident that she was early enough for work to have time for a relaxation walk. On this street, quaint family houses boasted spring trees coming into full bloom and in one corner, a line of preschool students walked in unison to the park. Stopping in her tracks, she observes a beautiful shrine with steep stairs and an astonishing Torii standing proud, while at her entrance stands a stranger.

He was dutifully sweeping the steps and at the first glance he was not handsome at all…yet the way the sun shone on him—enveloping him in light and highlighting his black hair tastefully mused on his head or his solemn face filled with concentration, Aiko swears that she heard wedding bells. Climbing the stairs with cool indifference, she tried to strike up a conversation with the attractive Shrine worker.

“Good morning! What a beautiful shrine, my name is Sato Aiko, nice to meet you”, she bowed in greeting.

Stopping his work, he looked up and provided a friendly smile, “Ah—good morning to you as well. We don’t get a lot of pretty girls visiting the Higurashi Shrine, my name is Higurashi Ichirou.”

Aiko blushed prettily and asked about Ichirou’s job at the shrine; he explains that he follows family tradition of becoming a Shinto Priest and he is currently in training.

“I love the work and I grew up here”, he assured her, “but if I had a choice? I wanted to be an architect.” Upon revealing this, he grimaced and smiled goofily.

“I’m sorry I told you this, you’re probably thinking what a weirdo, huh?”

Noting the bashful grin and the way his face lit up when he spoke about his dream, “No not at all, it’s admirable.”

Noticing the time, Aiko excused herself and promised to return after work. Jogging down the steps, she looked back and saw Ichirou returning to his cleaning. It turns out fate has not forgotten about her and things are starting to look up

**September 5, 1995**

Tears filled her eyes and her hand shook in the larger palms of her beloved. Aiko doesn’t know if she said yes audibly, but from Ichirou’s similarly glistening eyes, her answer was satisfactory. Placing the ring on her ring finger, never in her life has her heart felt heavy of joy.

**July 28, 1996**

Cradling the bundle in her arms, she released a satisfied sigh. After six hours of labor, Higurashi Kagome finally arrived into this world. A healthy baby girl with a tuff of midnight black hair and the jewel of her father’s eyes.

Handing the baby to Ichirou, he hummed, “My little Kagome, so ready for the world. I hope your heart grows as strong as your mother’s.”

**August 16, 2000**

The phone receiver fell on the floor and the thump of the object hitting the tiles echoed in the silent house. Pregnant Aiko steadied herself by grabbing unto the couch and sat down slowly.

“Mrs. Higurashi? Hello? Are you okay, ma’am? Your husband was placed in Sōgō hospital”, the responder yelled on the other line but she only heard a response of stifled sobs.

Aiko stood up and walked away from the phone abandoned on the tiled floor. Never in her lfe has her heart felt heavy with despair.

**August 17, 2000**

Fate has an ironic sense of humor. On August 16, 2000 at 5 PM Ichirou Higurashi passed away from a tragic accident. A few hours later, his wife was admitted to hospital for she gone into labor. It was like an exchange of life; a cycle that needs to be observed.

Four year old Kagome poked the cheeks of her new baby brother and curiously pointed out, “Okaasan, why does little brother look so slimy and pudgy?”

“Kagome, you have to be a good big sister to your brother”, Aiko reminded her daughter and motioned for Kagome to bring the baby carrier bed next to her.

Pushing the strands that escaped her ponytail, she prayed, “Ichirou wherever you are, don’t you dare slack off watching our kids! Just because you’re dead, doesn’t mean you’re still not their father”, wiping away a stray tear, “I love you and I’ll raise them well.”


	2. An Overfilling Sentiment

**May 3, 2001**

Kagome was always told to do all things with a full heart. Her mother constantly pushes her to do her best, whether it was handling her baby brother Sōta, kindergarten, or the current crayon drawing of her cat Buyo.

“Boys and girls, we have a new friend today! This is Takahashi Inuyasha, he moved from America”, immediately after Teacher Kaede announced this, scattered whispers began about his ‘white hair’ and him being a ‘foreigner’. A woman in a flowing red dress bent down to whisper in Inuyasha’s ear, who nodded shyly.

Inuyasha did not just tower over all the kindergarten students, he stood out completely with his long unkempt white hair. If it wasn’t for his prominent hazel eyes, he would be just a streak of white being, for his skin was as pale as his mane. The new student resigned to the corner of the room and took out a green ball from his backpack, then sat down clutching the object protectively.

Kagome observed Inuyasha and her heart ached for this kid; her mother’s voice reverberated in her mind telling her to approach him. Abandoning the coloring station, she walked towards him and crouched so they were eye level.

“Hi Inuyasha! I like your toy and green is my favorite color too, my name is Higurashi Kagome,” she held out her hand in a pleasant manner.

Still grasping the green ball in his left hand, he cautiously held out his right to shake Kagome’s small hands, “Hi Kagome.”

His voice was so raspy that Kagome almost missed his greeting and it seemed that Inuyasha was not accustomed to talking. It wasn’t a problem for Kagome, because she like to do the talking anyway. Though the conversation appeared to be one sided, Inuyasha responded with one word sentences and listened intently.

Sitting beside her new friend, Kagome narrates the latest news about her life at the shrine, “My Okaasan said to me, I have to treat Sōta with a full heart. But he is so annoying and all he does and poop, then cry, and then repeat!”

Suddenly, she notices subtle tears bouncing off the green ball that Inuyasha was keen on keeping it close to himself.

“I m-miss my Okaasan”, he stutters as he pulls in his knees to hug.

“Inuyasha, it’s okay. Later when school is over, our Okaasan usually comes to pick us up and remember your Okaasan said to behave”, Kagome remembers the beautiful woman who dropped off Inuyasha and pats his back in the endeavor to pacify him.

Hiccupping and wiping away his tears, “That’s not my Okaasan! My r-real Okaasan left m-me! S-she’s gone, the-ey told her t-to go away.”

Kagome felt helpless and wrapped her arms around Inuyasha, tucking his head under her chin while humming a distant song. Eventually, he calmed down enough to fall asleep leaning on her shoulder.

“Kagome-chan, I wanted to intervene and help earlier but you seemed to have taken care of it already”, the teacher motioning to the snoring Inuyasha, “besides, I never heard him speak, until now with you.”

“Teacher, what happened to Inuyasha’s Okaasan?”

Scratching her head and considering if she should tell the five year old girl, Kagome interrupts her thoughts, “Teacher Kaede don’t worry, my Okaasan always told me that I’m recelative.”

Kaede smiled remembering Aiko whose daughter was much like her, “Kagome, I think you mean receptive, but I agree…you are quite receptive.”

Choosing her words carefully, she began her story, “Inuyasha’s father, Taisho Takahashi, is a handsome man, he was loved by many ladies. Yet, he only gave his heart to two: Harumi and Izayoi.”

“Harumi was Mr. Takahashi’s wife and they had a son named Sesshomaru”, Kaede explained.

Kagome interjected, “Oh that must be the pretty lady in red…What about Ms. Izayoi? What was she?”

Already regretting telling the young girl the story, she knew she could not stop, now that Kagome is invested.

“Izayoi was a Japanese-American and lived abroad, Mr. Takahashi visited her often because she was his special friend and they also had a baby, which was Inuyasha. Sadly, Harumi did not like Mr. Takahashi always leaving and told him to stop seeing Izayoi.”

Kagome gasped, “Why can’t they just share?”

“It isn’t simple like that and as Mr. Takahashi stopped visiting Izayoi, she became very sad. Last month she passed away of a broken heart and Inuyasha was moved here in Japan to live with his father, new step-mother, and half-brother Sesshomaru.”

Observing Kagome, Kaede saw that she was processing this new information and is scrunching her nose in a manner that indicated mewling of a difficult problem. Kagome clapped her hand excitedly, cautious with the sleeping Inuyasha on her shoulder.

“I understand now Teacher Kaede! Ms. Izayoi must have loved Inuyasha with a full heart and when he had to be with Ms. Harumi whose heart was already full with Sesshomaru, she did not give him her all and only halves.”

Seeing Kaede’s puzzled look, Kagome continued: “That’s why Inuyasha is sad and I know how to fix this. By loving Inuyasha with a full heart, I will give him my all, I pinky swear promise”, she took her pinky and hooked it over the sleeping Inuyasha’s pinky.

**July 17, 2004**

“What the Hell did you say about my mom?!” Inuyasha pushed Arata on the wall with his left hand and held his right as a threat.

“I said your mom was an American whore! Everyone in Elementary School knows it, you can move to Junior High and they’re still going to know you’re a dirty basta—”, his yelling was stopped with Inuyasha’s knuckles almost slamming onto his face.

“Inuyasha!”

Turning around, he saw Kagome with her signature pig-tails and hand on her hips stance.

“What did I say about beating people up? And on the last day of school too”, striding towards him with a scowl.

Inuyasha loosens his grip and Arata loses his balance from the abrupt gesture, he sneers at Inuyasha, “Look it’s your girlfriend coming around to save you again, she’s not always going to be around toopugh—”, the last word was swallowed by a loud groan from the pain he felt delivered by Kagome’s kick to his crotch.

If anyone witnessed this moment, they can pinpoint the exact time Inuyasha erupted into childish laughter.

Later that afternoon an annoyed Sesshomaru arrives at the principal office with a frown deeper than his usual brooding facial expression.

The principal welcomes the older brother, “Ah Sesshomaru! I’m sorry to have called you from high school, it seems that your brother has gotten into a fight with a classmate.”

Sesshomaru stands beside the first chair in the room containing his troublesome sibling and looks at the second chair occupied by his keeper: Kagome. Audibly sighing, for someone who was 12 years old and barely four feet, she sure had a lot of fire in her.

“Look Sesshomaru-sama, it wasn’t Inuyasha, it was me”, Kagome confessed to the rug.

The principal contends, “Now Ms. Higurashi, I told you that there is no need to cover up for Inuyasha”, someone knocks on the door, “oh, come in please.”

Entering was a shaken Arata and a wary nurse who revealed, “Arata here has admitted that he called Inuyasha inappropriate names and that Kagome was the one who kicked him in a delicate area.”

Sesshomaru questioned, “Delicate area?”

Arata looked too embarrassed to expand, but characteristically Kagome takes the reign and clarifies, “I kicked his penis.”

Inuyasha breaks out into giggles and the adults chide Kagome’s language, while Sesshomaru hides his chuckle behind a loud cough.

**November 9, 2010**

Sitting crossed leg in Takahashi’s state of the art gym, she observes the sparring of Sesshomaru and Inuyasha. They gracefully move in a complicated dance; the occasional meeting of their shinai swords disturbing the comfortable silence in the room.

Sesshomaru’s sudden expert attack on Inuyasha’s shoulder causes him to lose balance and thus ending their session. It is obvious that he won for he was once president of the high school’s Kendo club and despite moving on to a university, he still maintained the swordsmanship skills.

Inuyasha stands up to bow which Sesshomaru reciprocates, both began removing their Bōgu and was approached by a persistent Kagome.

“That was awesome Inuyasha, you really held your own against Sesshomaru-sama. I’m sure tomorrow at the Kendo club tryouts, you will make it”, she declared.

Dismissing her compliment, he stalks out of the gym with a hurt pride.

“Do not mind him Kagome, he still does not understand the dignity of losing”, he hesitates to put his hand on her shoulder as a gesture of comfort but settles on awkwardly placing it at his sides.

Over the years, Kagome, Inuyasha, and Sesshomaru grew inseparable. Kagome and Inuyasha as obnoxious menaces, while Sesshomaru the responsible one who cleans up their mess. However as Senior High School began, tension crept in this dynamic trio. Inuyasha suffered in the shadows of his brother’s legacy, who was popular as Kendo club president and star pupil. Sesshomaru then grew distant and the only person bridging them together was Kagome.

‘She has grown incredibly well’, he notes at her physique: elegant height, long midnight hair, a unique form of beauty is what Kagome possessed. He rarely finds women attractive, because they were usually caught up with frivolous things. However, Kagome was an exception. She was predictable at the same time spontaneous, gentle as she is fierce, intelligent but naïve.

“Uhm Sesshomaru-sama, I need your advice?”

Tilting his head slightly indicating her to continue.

“I-I grew up with you guys and we’re practically best friends, so I wanted to tell you that I plan on confessing to Inuyasha.”

Sesshomaru didn’t know how to react; a mixture of feelings stirred in him. First, annoyance then jealousy which answered for him, “Do as you please.”

Watching Sesshomaru’s back exit the gym, Kagome had a feeling that there was more to his reply.


	3. Chapter 3

**June 6, 2014**

Kagome always committed in doing things with a full heart. Therefore, when she found herself loving Inuyasha with half of a heart, she grew restless. Inuyasha was encoded in her to love, then why did she stop loving him fully? Or when?

When she told Inuyasha that she liked him in the beginning of Senior High School it went as predicted; he was elated by her declaration and immediately they were boyfriend-girlfriend. Nevertheless, years pass by and their once honeymoon phase withered down to canceled date nights and vague texts.

Doubt didn’t belong in her vocabulary, then again it crept on her life and caused her to question the compatibility of their relationship. It was apparent to both of them that they began to make excuses in staying together; their parents said they were meant to be, friends praised their appearance as a couple, but the only one unhappy with them dating was Sesshomaru.

This irritated Kagome for he constantly goaded them in his monotone voice, “You will eventually break up” or “Grow up and stop playing around”. She figured the secondary reason she stayed with Inuyasha throughout these years was because she took Sesshomaru’s disapproval as a challenge and she would take any opportunity to compete against this arrogant prick.

Laughing to herself, she realizes that she has lost. Here she is sitting on the wet steps of her ex-boyfriend’s front porch. Hours ago she committed to having a heart to heart with Inuyasha who avoided all things emotional. Surprisingly, he listened with maturity and responded differently from what she expected.

“Kagome I’m not fucking blind, I can see that”, pausing he mewls on the right words, “we lost that something.”

She snickered and teased him, “That something? Are you saying I’m not a good kisser?”

Inuyasha paled and scrambled to elaborate, “No—What!? Kagome stop that…you know you’re good…uh, look we don’t talk like this anymore ya know?”

Kagome nods understanding, “Yeah it does get awkward, I can’t be mean to you anymore”, she punches him on the shoulder playfully, “this relationship stuff is hard.”

Smirking like a Cheshire cat, Inuyasha countered, “Yeah, well you’re a crap girlfriend.”

Doing a mock gasp and clutching her chest, he concurred, “But, you’re an awesome best friend.”

Looking back at their profound moment, Kagome knew it was for the best that she broke up with him and returned as friends. He half joked and half seriously reminded her that they can still pretend to be a couple, so they can get discounts at his favorite ramen shops.

She held out her hand far from the sheltering of the porch canopy and watched raindrops pool in her palms. The rain came in perfect timing; a relief from the summer heat. Kagome intently observed the raindrops running down the leaves of the plant besides her, then tugged the stem and felt hundreds of tiny drops propel on her school shirt.

Kagome was so preoccupied with the rain that she didn’t notice a tall figure approach her.

“Are you locked out?”

Looking up, she sees Sesshomaru holding a black umbrella with his polo and pants slightly soaked. Noting the bag, she guesses that he just returned from his classes in Tokyo University.

“Nah, just enjoying the rain”, indicating the spot next to her, “come sit with me?”

Sesshomaru considered ignoring her request, but he lately has a difficult time saying no to her. First, he places his bag and the soaked umbrella by the front door, then sits on the steps with ease.

“You were right.”

He wanted to be clever and respond with ‘I’m always right but which instance?’ instead he waits for her to speak again.

“I broke up with Inuyasha,” she mumbled while playing with her hair.

“What did he do? Do you want me to speak to him,” Sesshomaru says speak, what he means is kill him.

Turning her body to face him, she disclosed, “No it wasn’t him this time, it was me…I just couldn’t do it fully anymore.”

Biting her lip, Kagome recalls, “It was nice at first, you know? Having a boyfriend. But I-I don’t know what went wrong, I thought that if I committed entire myself to this relationship, we would be happy.”

Clenching her fist, she states in frustration, “I always believed that if you do things with your whole heart that you won’t lose anything. If I have loved Inuyasha fully, then maybe things would’ve worked? But I-I couldn’t even do that! And my father, if I loved him fully, would he have lived too?”

Cupping her cheeks, Sesshomaru says slowly, “What about yourself? Have you loved yourself fully, before?”

Closing her gaping mouth, Kagome stares into Sesshomaru’s eyes. Both Inuyasha and he inherited the distinct hazel eyes of their father, except Sesshomaru’s resemble that of the sun. Sometimes, when Kagome looks at him, she has to squint like she’s starring at the bright glistening face of the sun.

“No, I haven’t”, distracted by the way Sesshomaru’s right hand left her cheek and started a trek on her hair, gently caressing it.

He smiles, not the condescending grin he is accustomed to give her, but a genuine smile, “When should you start?”

Her face lighting up with a brilliant grin, “How about now?”

Grabbing his wrist, she flies off the porch and into the rainstorm. Arms held out like she’s embracing the water, she spins with abandon. Throwing her head back, she lets out an unashamed loud laughter and almost faltering when she hears Sesshomaru join her.


End file.
